Showcase: It's Not About Communication: Why Everything you Know about Couples Therapy is Wrong by Dr. Bruce Chalmer

Today I'm reviewing Dr. Bruce Chalmer's latest self help book, It's Not About Communication: Why Everything you Know About Couples Therapy is Wrong. It's very informative and helpful.
Enjoy!

ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0BL8BBY2X
Publisher: BookBaby
Release Date: 01-15-2023
Length: 159 pp
Source: Author for Review
Buy It: Amazon/B&N/ IndieBound

ADD TO: GOODREADS

Overview:

We're Having Problems Communicating. Can Couples Therapy Help?

Yes! Couples therapy can help—but not by teaching you how to communicate. If you and your partner are having trouble, the problem isn't how you're communicating. The problem is what you're communicating.

Written in a relatable, easy to understand and sometimes irreverent style, It's Not About Communication! will not only help you understand the problems you're having--it will help you get on the path to solving them. Whether you're in couples therapy, thinking about it, or want to solve your problems on your own, this book will point you in the right direction.

And if you're a couples therapist yourself, this book will inspire you to work with your clients rather than on them--and help you regain that sense of dedication and purpose that led you to become a therapist in the first place.

You'll learn:
• Why practicing communication rules and techniques is wasting your time
• How a simple seven-word formula can guide you toward healing, growth, and passionate connection
• Why a mindset of faith—not necessarily religious—is the key to successful couples therapy
• How to decide if your couples therapy is helping—and what to do if it isn't
• Why ideas open possibilities, and ideologies shut down possibilities—and why that's important for couples therapy
• Why your couples therapist's advice is probably useless—and what you really need from your therapist
• Why couples therapy is a lot like improv theater

Whether you're looking to improve your own relationship, or helping others improve theirs, It's Not About Communication! will guide and inspire you.

My Review:

It’s Not About Communication:
Why Everything You Know About Couples Therapy is Wrong
Dr. Bruce Chalmer

 

Whether you’re a couple seeking help, a couples counselor/therapist or just someone who would like to broaden their horizons this helpful and informational book is for you. I myself have been married for 44 years. In those years there were some troubled times but my husband and I have managed to beat the odds, so when I started the book I didn’t think there would be anything I could use but I was wrong as Dr. Chalmer has some very wise words of wisdom about relationships as he unveils the behind the scenes mysteries of couples therapy.

Some of the more important things I learned in the book is the difference between ideas and ideology in terms of couples therapy and how some therapists can actually make the relationship worse by using strict ideologies and not being open to different solutions ie ideas.

I like that Dr. Chalmer gives examples but the characters are an amalgamation of his patients so if you recognize yourself in this book and were a patient of his it’s a total coincidence.

The other interesting and informative part of Dr. Chalmer’s book is his take on faith in a relationship, now he’s not talking about blind acceptance or religious faith but by simply accepting reality, but read the book for a better explanation.

Finally if you are in couples therapy now and YOU believe it’s helping you and your partner it doesn’t matter if you found that therapist through a friend, your doctor or even if like Dr. Chalmer says, you Google them then it’s worth it.

I highly recommend this book to you if you seek couples therapy and I also recommend his former book Reigniting the Spark another really great book for couples.

About the author:
Dr. Bruce Chalmer is a psychologist in Vermont who has been working with couples for over thirty years. Through his teaching, consulting, writing, podcast, and videos about relationships, his ideas have helped thousands of couples and their therapists.

He has served in leadership positions in several Vermont Jewish communities, and is also a musician, composer, and choral director. He lives with his wife Judy Alexander in South Burlington. They have five adult children and six grandchildren.

For more information visit his website: https://brucechalmer.com--This text refers to the paperback edition.